JimboNed Prompts
by FrankenPup
Summary: This will be a collection of Jimbo/Ned prompts, they will vary in rating, and topic. Each prompt will have a summary and warning at the beginning of each chapter.
1. Know It All

**Title:** Know it all

 **SUMMARY:** While helping Ned study for his exams, it gets a little bit steamy.  
 **Pairings:** Jimbo/Ned  
 **Disclaimer:** I read this about 10 times, but I'm sure I missed some spelling mistakes. This is an AU where Jimbo and Ned go to highschool together, and eventually to college.  
 **Story Warnings:** adult themes

"When did the civil war begin?"

"1861."

"What _day_?"

"April 12th."

"When did President Abraham Lincoln die?"

" April 16th, 1865."

Jimbo narrowed his eyes, contemplating a more difficult question.

"What what was the bloodiest battle in American history?"

Ned's expression turned thoughtful for a moment, but didn't waste time answering the question.

"Battle of Antietam, estimated three thousand dead with over twenty thousand casualties."

The larger teen skimmed over the textbook with a huff, frustrated he was unable to find a question that would stump his best friend. He reviewed every question prepared in the textbook, and the smaller man had yet to miss one. Ned would probably be able to cite them in order by this point, yet he still requested to go over each one over and over again.

Jimbo watched Ned pace slowly back and forth in front of the table he was seated at. For some reason, movement was one of Ned's teaching aides. It helped him remember things, Jimbo would never understand how, or why, but it did seem to work.

With a heavy sigh, he let his eyes unfocus as the pacing lolled him into a pleasant hypnosis. It wasn't until the dark haired teen waved a hand in front of his face did Jimbo realized he zoned out, he quickly rubbed his eyes, "I still dunno why we are studying this chapter again, you know it better than the back of your hand."

Ned paused his pacing and rolled his eyes at the whiny complaint. He sounded like a kid trying to get out of cleaning his room, "It's just a review, quit whining." He teased, "Just finish the practice questions and we'll get dinner." Making a mock pleading face, complete with a quivering lip and batting his lashes.

Jimbo resisted the urge to close his eyes and pretend he didn't see those pretty, pale blue eyes batting in his direction.

Groaning in defeat, Jimbo did as he was told, flipping the pages and skimming to find the review questions at the end of the chapter. After drumming his fingers on the hardwood, he spoke.

"What was the first major victory for the South?"

"The Battle of Bull Run."

"Whose military genius and personality is often credited with holding the Confederate Army together?"

"Robert E. Lee."

Frowning at the dark haired male lazily walking around the small apartment, Jimbo pressed his fist to his cheek.

"Alright smarty pants, when was the last time I changed my underwear?"

Ned was a bit surprised by the question but wrinkled his nose in disgust, "Gross, next question."

"Ah ha! Sorry to tell ya buddy, but you ain't gonna pass your exam if you dunno when I last changed my skivvies."

Ned snorted, unable to hold back a small chuckle. He quickly joined Jimbo at the small table to pull out a stack of flashcards stuck between the pages, "I did the laundry last week, there's no way you're out of underwear."

He made a mock buzzer noise, "Ehh, try again."

Ned lips curled, chuckling at his silliness "If that's gonna be on the exam, I shoulda studied you without your pants on more often."

A cocky grin split Jimbo's face and he tossed his arm over the back of his chair. "Ha ha, very funny." His words oozing sarcasm as he gave Ned a harmless punch to the shoulder, "You got this stuff down. You're 'lot smarter than anyone I've met around here, you ain't gonna have a problem passing with flying colors."

The smaller male pursed his lips, looking over his flash cards, "I'm sure, but it still doesn't hurt to study. You're just upset about helping me because you didn't have lunch today." After a moment, Ned went on, feeling a bit bashful as he did so "Thanks again by the way, you saved my ass from getting thrown out of class for the day. I can't miss a day of notes in his class or I'll fall behind and never catch up."

Jimbo brushed off the thanks, pulling off his baseball cap to run his finger through his hair. "No problem buddy, glad I managed to get there on time. My boss had just sent me on break when you called."

Ned managed to forget one of his textbooks in Jimbo's car that morning. And Jimbo hadn't noticed it after dropping him off on the college campus. Low and behold, two hours later he got a call from a frantic boyfriend about missing his book. Unfortunately one of Ned's professors was the spawn of Satan himself, and the smallest thing will get you thrown out of class. Jimbo was out of breath by the time he got outside the classroom. He managed to get there just before the bell rang, enough time for Ned to thank him with a quick kiss and disappear into the classroom.

Though the small display of affection was sweet, it flustered Jimbo more than he would like to admit. It only got worse when a woman asked if he was ok on his way back to the parking lot. If his face wasn't red then, steam must have started pouring from his ears. Let's just say PDA was not his favorite thing in the world.

Long story short, Jimbo missed his lunch break to bring his roommate his textbook.

In addition to sharing Jimbo's car, they shared an apartment a few blocks away from Ned's college campus. After high school, Ned's plans were to go straight to college and follow his passion for American history. Unfortunately, Jimbo didn't feel the same way.

College was something he didn't feel prepared for. Even growing up, he never particularly cared about school, or learning for that matter. His mother homeschooled him for years before he went to a public school, even that was torture. He was already insecure about his intelligence he didn't need a way to find out if he was dumber than a box of rocks.

With their relationship under the radar from their parents, and other close friends, they decided moving in together would keep them both off the street. With Jimbo working a full time job, he was able to pay the bills and give his boyfriend more time to focus on his work. Ned's part time job income went to groceries and saving to pay the tuition fees.

Jimbo used a heavy hand to rub his boyfriend's shoulder, "You're gonna do great. You just recited that damn book to me yesterday like it was your favorite movie. You're gonna manage to get a hundred and ten on that test. You see, or I'll, I'll do the laundry for a week." His thick southern drawl more evident as his words turned encouraging.

Ned leaned back a little, tilting his head to the side with a tiny smile, "How about you do the dishes for a week instead."

The larger man laughed nervously "Let's not get ridiculous now."

Ned smile became a full fledged evil grin, "Get those hands ready, you're gonna be scrubbing till you can't feel your fingers."

Jimbo scoffed, but snapped the book shut with a solid thud, "I'd sooner eat my own shoe before doin' them damn dishes."

"That's acceptable too."

Jimbo snorted again, letting his fingers run through the teens dark, shaggy hair. "Deal. Get a hundred and ten and i'll eat my boot."

With a stupid smile on his face, Ned hummed at the touch, enjoying the way Jimbo would run his fingers through his hair and gently untangle the knots as he went. It was a nice peaceful moment, simply enjoying each other's presence after a stressful day. At least it was, until a mischievous thought popped into the smaller male's head, and he kept his sneaky smile hidden in the crook of his arm.

"How about a quick bonus round and we'll call it a day? And go get you some dinner?" ignoring the groan he got in response, Ned pushed himself up. Deciding now was a good time to saddle the larger teen on the chair, and started to adjust Jimbo's plaid collared shirt, smoothing at the wrinkles on his chest.

Jimbo's face scrunched up in confusion, but was too busy focusing on their closeness to pay much attention to every word. "What? What about gettin' dinner?"

"To be honest, I'm _hungry_ for something else."

That shut him up real quick, Jimbo lips snapped shut and swallowed thickly. When Ned had the larger teens full attention, he continued, "Just a quick test to see how much you've been paying attention." Ned's lips curled into a sly smirk, his hands toying with the buttons of his boyfriend's shirt.

Jimbo swallowed again and felt his cheeks warming as he cleared his throat, trying his best not to let the smaller teen get to him. But it was becoming difficult with the sneaky devil himself snuggly sitting on his lap, and had his hands all over his chest. "Test?" he parroted, voice a tad higher than usual.

Ned nodded, letting himself pop the first button "When did Abraham Lincoln die?"

Jimbo's breathing picked up, and he thought for a moment, ultimately furious he snapped the textbook shut, "Uh-."

Ned hummed giving him an encouraging kiss, leaning closer to give a small hint. "Same year the civil war ended."

His eyes shot open "1865!"

Ned nodded, popping a few more buttons on Jimbo's shirt and teasingly toying with the edges of his own.

"Here's an easy one, why the Civil War was fought?"

Jimbo's hands went to hold Ned's hips, unable to take his eyes off the glimpse of skin on the darker teens belly, "To abolish slavery."

Ned grinned, he tugged off his shirt.. Jimbo chewed his inner cheek while his eyes roamed the expanse of skin. Ned might be small for his age, but he sure as hell looked different without a shirt covering his chest. He wasn't build like a bodybuilder or even the strongest guy around, but he was lean and his arms had a nice definition to them that made Jimbo's mouth go dry. All that time in the boxing ring was enough to make him strong yet lean.

Ned leaned in a little closer so their breaths would mingle. "When was the last time we fucked?"

Jimbo gave a low groan, trying to wrack his brain while hands toyed with his chest and traveled lower. "U-uh, last week I think?"

Ned's hands stopped, cocking his head playfully to the side, "Are you sure about that?"

With the fear of being wrong, Jimbo quickly stammered to change his answer, "S-shoot, uh last Tuesday when we fooled around in the back of my car."

Ned cocked an eyebrow as to how Jimbo recalled it in detail, but nibbled on his ear. "Final answer?"

Jimbo shivered, but narrowed his eyes with finality "Final answer."

Ned chuckled, stealing his boyfriend's baseball cap and placing it on his own mess of hair. Mimicking a buzzer noise like Jimbo had minutes prior. "Ehh wrong. Sorry, try again."

"What?!"

Ned scooted off Jimbo's lap, gathering his tossed shirt to pull it back over his head. "It was actually a Thursday, not a Tuesday. Sorry pooh bear, no sexy time for you" the shorter man teased, putting a disgusting amount of sweetness on the nickname.

"Ugh don't call me that you lil piece of crap" Jimbo rubbed his reddened face, uncaring for his half unbuttoned shirt. "I'm calling shenanigans on your bullshit, Tuesday, Thursday same difference!"

Smiling as if he didn't just leave the poor man high and dry, Ned hummed, taking off the cap to bow properly after stepping into his shoes. "Maybe you should come with me to class and take that test for me, I bet if you studied like that you would remember everything we went over."

Jimbo pressed his fist to his cheek, still giving him the stink eye.

Ned hummed again, slipping a hoodie far too large to be his own over his head, "Fix your shirt and let's go some get pizza. If you're good we'll even get a round of beers." Harmless jabbings at one another were a huge chunk of their relationship. Too bad for Jimbo, Ned was skilled at teasing.

Grudgingly getting to his feet, Jimbo nabbed his hat back and slipped into his own boots, nearly forgetting about his wallet and keys, "If I wasn't so hungry I would fuck you through the wall. I hope you know that." Pouting a bit to himself.

Patting his lover's back, Ned hip checked him as they stepped out the door, "Come on lazy butt, I'm picking the toppings this time.


	2. Wedding Bands

**Title:** Wedding bands

 **Summary:** Ned and Jimbo have lived together for years, and Jimbo finally has something he needs to say.

 **Pairings:** Jimbo/Ned

 **Disclaimer:** I read this about 10 times, but I'm sure I missed some spelling mistakes. This is based off this ( art/this-is-508418609) by eat-a-dicker on tumblr. Seriously look at it.

 **Story Warnings:** old dudes being gay.

"Hey Ned?"

Jimbo peeked into the kitchen, watching his best friend expertly maneuvering a hot skillet full of sizzling bacon.

No response came, but Ned did turn his head slightly to show he was listening.

The larger man blew out a loud breath, trotting over to one of the dinner table and taking a seat as he snatched up a piece of toast laid out for breakfast.

"I uh, I got somethin' real important to tell you buddie."

This time, Ned turned to him again, curiously. Gently scooping out the sizzling bacon and turning the stove off with his only arm. When everything was out of the way, he reached for his voice box.

"Mnn- I'm listening."

Jimbo face looked Pinker than usual, which was saying something since the cabin was always relatively warm thanks to the roaring fire place. He appeared to be contemplating his next words as he busied himself with his piece of toast. The dark haired man almost repeated himself after seconds ticked away and became minutes. Yet, Jimbo didn't speak. It wasn't until he took a large gulp of an open beer did he finally say what he needed to say.

"I'm gay."

Neds expression didn't change, stoic as ever. Silence stretched between the two while Jimbo was bit his tongue to prevent him from saying anything more. As they sat in a awkward silence, he toyed with a silver band wrapped around his ring finger.

"Mmnn- and?"

"And I love you."

Ned had the faintest smile curling his lips, leaning down to meet Jimbo half way for a quick kiss.

"Mn- I didn't notice."

Decorating his own remaining hand, Ned's own wedding band gleamed as he gave the larger man a proper good morning kiss.


	3. Nightmares

**Title:** Nightmares

 **SUMMARY:** Jimbo has a bad dream about his past, Ned is there to help him get through it.

 **Pairings:** Jimbo/Ned

 **Disclaimer:** I read this about 10 times, but I'm sure I missed some spelling mistakes.

 **Story Warnings:** mentioned masturbation, blood, gore, mentions of suicide, gayness

 _A barrage of bullets and haunting battle cries were their only warning of a surprise attack._

 _War taught Jimbo many things; discipline, respect, leadership, and most importantly, fear. But nothing could prepare him for the bullet piercing a fellow soldier's skull, mere steps ahead of him. His body fell like a rock into the knee deep marsh, floating on the water's surface as the dark marsh started to filter red._

 _"_ _It's an ambush!"_

 _The murky water sloshed wildly as the men scattered to find cover from the enemies lurking above their heads._

 _Jimbo pressed himself against the trunk of a tree surrounded in a thick brush. Ned wasn't by his side anymore, no doubt running for cover as metal began to rain from the sky. He might not be a devoted christian man, but he did pray to find his friend in one piece._

 _His body was in a buzz, limbs trembling and lips pressed in a tight line. Jimbo fiercely bit his lip to keep himself still, any quick movement might give away his position. Especially with the water ringlets as the soldiers trenched through the murky water. This wasn't their first run in with the Viet Cong, they had been attacked dozens of times, yet you never get used to the sudden sound of gunfire._

 _You simply waited, silently hoping when the guns did begin to smoke again, that you were far enough away to find cover._

 _All he knew was to hide, and fire his gun until he was directed otherwise. They weren't highly trained soldiers who weren't afraid to die. No, they were men; boys even, who were drafted into a war no one felt was justified. He knew how to handle a gun, sure, he could take apart his twelve gauge shotgun and put it back together twice as good as before. But gun handling and facing immediate death were two entirely different things._

 _Firing blindly into the trees above, another one of their men was hit and moaning in aggony. For every bullet they fired seemed to take out another dozen US soldiers. The enemy had the upper hand, and it was beginning to show as the bodies piled up. The water was turning red, yet he couldn't bring himself to care as it soaked into his uniform._

 _Branches snapped above his head and he fired a barrage, cursing the enemy he watched kill his squad members. A body fell, splashing into the water yet silenced by the noise around. It began to rain bodies as grenades were thrown into the trees. Bark exploded, sending splintered wood, leaves, and chunks of undefinable flesh to the already infested water below. His ears were ringing, mouths moving yet he couldn't make out what they were saying as the adrenaline rushed through his veins._

 _He caught a glimpse of messy black hair out of the corner of his eye, his assigned trainee had moved to find shelter, and Jimbo suddenly felt the urge to run across the short distance of open water. Jimbo may not have been drafted much longer than Ned, but a weird sense of guilt ate at his chest that someone who had yet to experience this war was shoved right into the front lines. Ned was actually a few years older than him, yet for some reason, it felt like an obligation to keep an eye on him. Ned Gerblansky quickly became his only true friend in this awful place. They got along like long lost pals, though they had a rocky start._

 _But that was an entirely different story._

 _"_ _Retreat! That's an order!"_

 _Three simultaneous bombs went off and Jimbo moved, smoke started to cloud over the area, keeping their location a blur from the enemy to move out. It was risky, but in a time like this, it was the only way to try and escape without looking like swiss cheese. They managed to push back enough to meet solid ground, sweet, solid ground beneath his feet was enough to make him happy these days._

 _He was moving in the direction he last saw Ned, in hopes of catching a glimpse of him. But an unexpected explosion went off to his left, he watched a man go flying in pieces after stepping on a hidden landmine. The blast was enough to knock him off his feet, the ringing made his world fuzzy, multiple voices shouting orders. Urging anyone able to still move to get their asses moving and help fallen soldiers. With a pained groan, Jimbo pushed himself to his feet. Barely acknowledging small, round objects falling from above._

 _When one bounced just inches from his body, and rolled away, his brain seemed to catch up with the rest of him. His legs refused to move as a grenade sat no more than feet from his crumpled body. His body seemed to fall asleep, or perhaps he was preparing himself to die. Because the next instant, it blew. But the explosion was all he was met with. The force once again through him back. The only thing he heard was the blood curdling scream through the constant ringing._

 _Dazed, Jimbo pushed himself up despite his aching muscles, a soldier beside him struggling back up as bullets scattered like a deadly rain. How did he survive such a close explosion? Jimbo turned slightly, the screaming still echoing in the smoky, area to see a man rolling on his back._

 _He finally had a face for the screaming._

 _He didn't realize it was Ned at first, the blood splattered across his face and sticking to his hair was enough to hide his identity. The smoke wafting in the air was becoming thicker by the second, but as he got closer to help his fellow soldier did his blood run cold. Shards of metal, bits of flesh, muscles and bone splattered across the leaves and bushes._

 _Everything after that was nonexistant, he recalls scrambling Ned into his arms. Desperate to get his only friend out of this god forsaken place out and out of harm's way. His fellow soldiers created a makeshift barrier around him as they retreated to camp. The wounded were first priority, Ned's missing arm was his first priority._

 _They managed to escape with a little over a few dozen casualties and only a few deaths, men were covered in blood, shot, missing limbs. But they managed to escape, they were still alive._

 _Ned was still alive._

 _Back at camp, Ned was placed at the medical tent, the other soldiers wounded in battle moaning around them while others were deathly silent._

 _The nurses refused to let anyone in until the soldiers were awake and stable, she had been talking but Jimbo couldn't focus on the words, just a jumble of noises and static. His own body managed to escape the multiple blasts with bruises and scratches. The overweight man was having a hard time hearing, but he kept that to himself. His eyes were locked on the man over her shoulder. She must have felt sympathy, because she stepped aside seeing the look on his face._

 _His best friend was sprawled on the bed. Blood soaking through his banged stub and chest, they removed his shirt to bandage the area and it made him sick. The skin peeking from beneath the bandages was distorted, mangled even. It looked as if someone splashed boiling water down Ned's side and let it fester in the already hot temperatures and diseased water._

 _He felt numb, Jimbo fell onto the small stool beside the bed and let the tears flow. Uncaring of who would see, Ned grabbed the grenade to save his life. Trying to chuck it out of harm's way. Saving Jimbo and several other men who had been in the blasts proximity. He hadn't even known what happened until he got back to camp. A fellow soldier had seen everything, in fact, Ned had been by his side moments before he bolted for the grenade. The smaller man had ran, scooped up the grenades to throw it out of harm's way, but it was too late. It barely left his hand before it exploded._

 _The world around Jimbo seemed to slow again, much like it had hours ago. Human forms became odd blobs as the his tears blurred his vision. The soldiers seemed to grieve too, shouts and moans grew louder but he realized it wasnt for his grief, the tent was on fire._

 _The flames engulfed the tent in seconds, explosions followed and all hell broke loose. They were under attack, again._

 _He was up, trying to force his arms under Ned's still body and away from the fire. He all but ripped Ned's IV out, only muttering an apology when a sharp intake of breath pulled at his heart strings. Shots once again echoed all around the burning tent. Boom after boom assaulted Jimbo's already aching head, the enemy had found their camp, this was their safe place, there was no where else to hide._

 _The world around him slowed once more, fire engulfed the camp as faces became terrifying creatures. The men he had grown to call his friends were burning alive._

 _Reality started to warp, his only priority was to hold Ned tight as their world began to turn to ashes. He tripped on a fallen body, and he clawed trying to catch his friends body. As the still body rolled, Ned's face became distorted, and he screamed, his head lulled to the side, and jaw went impossibly wide._

 _A foot came down on Jimbo's face, with a bloody mouth Jimbo whimpered as the enemy surrounded him. Their faces split in two with haunting grins, putting his squad members heads on spikes as the fire engulfed their camp. One grabbed Ned by the hair and his head came free. His blue eyes were clouded over as blood poured down his decapitated head. Flames teased the edges of his vision as the Viet Cong laughed, stabbing his best friends head onto a spike._

Jimbo gasped, shooting forward in a cold sweat as the memories from years past came back to haunt his dreams. Every excruciating detail of the screams, blood and bodies. Yet it wasn't entirely how he recalled his time in Vietnam.

His memories were becoming distorted by his imagination.

Jimbo rubbed his face with a shaky hand, frantically feeling for the lump sleeping at his side. The shift of the blankets beat down any terrifying thoughts of his nightmare yet to reach its end. The larger man held his head in hands before throwing the blankets off and dragging his feet quietly to the bathroom.

He was going to need a drink after that one.

Nightmares weren't an uncommon thing after his time in Vietnam. Even while he served, he was plagued with terrifying nightmares that made him too afraid to even close his eyes.

Vietnam did more bad than good on his psych, the war might have been won, but at such a horrible cost of soldiers and their own state of mind. Along with the nightmares, there was the PTSD, depression, stress, suicidal thoughts.

The usual.

Splashing cold water on his face, Jimbo gripped at the sinks edges to still his shaking hands. A quick drink and he should be fine, all without having to wake Ned from his slumber.

He snuck to the kitchen to grab a bottle of whisky and took a few big chugs on his way to the living room. Experience told him he wasn't going to go back to sleep anytime soon, so getting drunk and watching late night shows was a great way to spend the next few hours.

Glancing at the clock, he tired rubbed his eyes, 2:35am.

He clicked on the TV to a random channel, more as a distraction from the noise in his head rather than actual entertainment. His first priority was to down the bottle as quickly as possible, years of experience was enough to tell him that.

Jimbo took another large gulp, biting through the burn as the liquid washed down his throat. Wishing, just for a moment, he could forget what happened. He still remembered the faces, the men, the blood. Gun shots still rang in ears every time he heard fireworks, he still heard the screams of the enemy whenever he passed by a children's playground. It made him nauseous imagining the children he saw hiding in the trees, armed to the teeth with guns and a pocket full of bullets.

He didn't know how long he was staring at the TV, lost in his own thoughts when soft footsteps came down the hallway. Ned appeared from the darkness, looking tired without his signature sunglasses hiding his eyes.

Jimbo didn't say anything, only giving a small jerk of his head to acknowledge the other man's presence in the dark room, lit only by the TV's flashing glow. What could he say? Go back to bed? I'll make it to morning? Chances were low that Ned was up for a glass of water. They both had a weird sense of knowing when the other was in distress. After all, it was only the two of them in this big cabin.

The smaller man was indifferent to the response, and pressed his voice box to his throat, "Mnn- another nightmare?"

Jimbo groaned, feeling the warmth of the alcohol tingling his body and warming his face. He hit the nail on the head, "..Yeah."

Ned made himself comfortable at Jimbo's side before he even replied, voice box curled lazily in his fingers. He rubbed at his friend's shoulder comfortingly, ensuring a small amount of familiarity with the gentle touch. Neither men really expressed the need for comfort, but in situations like this, knowing you're not alone was something you simply couldn't buy. Being alone with your thoughts and memories with nothing as a buffer from the screams and blood shed eating away at your mind, you might as well kill yourself now.

They sat in silence, Ned stealing the bottle and taking his own drink from the nearly empty bottle.

"You too?"

A shrug came from the smaller man, absentmindedly toying with his voice box. "Mnn- Yeah. And I missed your fat ass."

Jimbo snorted at the reply but eagerly let his fingers run through Ned's dark, shaggy hair. Admiring the light streaks of grey forming near his ears, "Gay."

The two took comfort in each other's presence, Jimbo had his hands all over Ned to prove to himself what he saw in his mind wasn't true. The lifeless blue eyes wide and glazed over, mouth hanging open as if silently screaming.

"You're real right?"

Ned paused to look at the larger man, gauging his expression with a blank face. Jimbo wasn't looking at him, instead his eyes were glued to the TV, bathed in a pale blue light, Ned watched his brows twitch and lips tighten, a slight quiver shook his lips.

Ned trailed a hand up the other man's hairy chest, until he got to his chin to tilt it towards himself. Once he had Jimbo's attention he shifted closer, lips nearly brushing when suddenly pinching his shoulder with his only hand.

"Ow! What the horse shit?!"

Neds lips curled into a devilish smile, slinking away slightly just incase Jimbo decided revenge was the best course of action.

"Mnn- you're not dreaming." Unable to completely wipe away the slight curl of his lips watching Jimbo glare lazily at him, "Mn- it was about me again hmm?"

Jimbo rubbed his abused arm and pouted. Ned always had a way of helping him through tough times. Silly things that distracted him from the reality still dancing behind his eyes. A dumb joke, a quick kiss, simple questions to momentarily pull him away from the darkness.

After thinking it over, he nodded his head solemnly.

Ned wiggled the stub of his right arm, his own way of showing he was alright, despite missing a piece of his body, "Mn- you wanna talk about it?"

Jimbo immediately shook his head, not wanting to discuss how he watched Ned's head be mounted on a spike. "Nah, not right now, I ain't had nearly enough to drink to talk about it."

Not pressing any further, Ned rubbed his lover's back gently. They both suffered from terrifying nightmares of their war days, but Jimbo was the one who was becoming more of an issue. He was losing sleep again, becoming irritable and refused to be away from his partner for too long. It was becoming frustrating but it was just a side effect of living war.

But they suffered together and presented what they had in nam, comfort. You had no one but your squad members in the time of war. Many soldiers developed close relationships to carry the burden of war together rather than alone. For the times they both were struggling, nothing helped more than just listening to another soldier's fears and torment. You could single handedly save a man's life just from listening.

"You wanna talk about yours?"

Contemplating the offer, the smaller man rested his head on Jimbo's shoulder. Talking about their nightmares seemed to help, if only a little. They found if they talked about it, it didn't scare them as much.

"Mn- mine was about the helicopter mission." Ned didn't seem to be focused as he spoke "Mn- but it wasn't as bad as it usually is. But for some reason we were having hot chocolate." He ranted a bit, his robotic voice filling the still house, "The chopper went down and we took out the entire Viet Cong army all on our own. You came in on a horse and we rode off into the sunset, until they dropped agent orange." the smaller man's breath caught in his throat and he stopped. Letting his hand drop to his lap, along with his voice. Jimbo knew he didn't need to hear anymore, and pressed a reassuring kiss to Ned's forehead.

Soon after, Ned urged Jimbo to lie down on the couch to try and get some sleep. The larger man grudgingly obliged but wasn't expecting Ned to lie on top of him, using him as a big, squishy pillow.

"You know that I ain't going back to sleep. I don't think you are either."

Ned fumbled for his voice box for a moment before pressing it to his throat once more "Mnn- duh. Just getting comfy for bad television." He shifted on Jimbo's chest, though it wasn't the most comfortable, it was a way to bring Jimbo peace of mind. He didn't need to be awake all night to keep his friend company. His touch was enough to scare away those fears.

Jimbo's arms curled around his smaller form, keeping him from slipping off and back to the bedroom.

Ned grabbed for the remote and clicked through the channels until he landed on a channel that didn't make him gag. Late night television was ridiculous, nothing but bad infomercials and weird trippy TV shows made for stoners.

The larger man stared at the tangled mop of Neds hair, down his back and at the missing limb. It's flesh was horribly scared, all the way from the stub and halfway across his chest where the grenade exploded.

Ned saved his life that day, in more ways than one.

He recalled how terrified he had been, watching Ned's arm blow to smithereens. After he came home, he remembered in vivid detail how he actually watched Ned's arm disintegrate. The blast must have scared him enough to block something so terrifying from his memory. Because he did watch Ned come out of nowhere and try to save his life.

He couldn't express his gratitude for such a selfless act. He wouldn't be here if Ned had not thrown that grenade. Even if he apologized regularly, Ned never accepted it. It was his choice, he did it on purpose.

His mother had been so emotional when he finally got discharged and made it home in one piece. He was surrounded by his family, his living, breathing family, not just a photograph. Jimbo felt awful for not fighting to try and avoid the grenade that day, because he finally remembered why he was fighting to make it back alive. He would have missed his family if he died that day, and Ned helped him realize that.

Now it was all a distant memory, much like Vietnam.

"Do you miss your arm?"

Ned turned his head slightly, his hair tickling Jimbo's chest. Giving him a look that said 'did you really just ask me that?'

Quickly, he corrected himself, "You know what I mean damn it."

Still giving him a weird look Jimbo let his fingers drag across the stub that used to be the other man's arm. "Would you have done it if you know you were gonna lose it? I know you said you saved me on purpose but, shit Ned. You lost yer arm cause'a me."

Blinking with a static expression, the other man crossed his arms the best be could "Mn- I'd do it again."

"You can't tell me you would loose your other arm to save me, _again_." Without a moment's hesitation, Ned leaned upward to press a reassuring kiss to Jimbo's cheek. His head bobbed, wiggling his fingers of his only arm.

"Mnn- I'd learn to write with my toes."

Jimbo felt his eyes water, and frowned at the emotional weakness burning his eyes. Dragging him upward for a needy kiss, "Over my dead body, your feet are gross as hell."

Neds expression split into a smile, "Mn- I would learn to jerk it with my feet too."

Making a face, the overweight man swatted back, "Lay back down you idiot."

Small interactions like these distracted Jimbo from his fears and nightmares. No one quite had the talent to make him feel better quite like Ned did. He was happy to still have something that kept him sane after the war. Even if that thing was a one armed man, who spoke through a voice box.


	4. Video Camera

**Title:** Video Camera

 **SUMMARY:** Ned spends some time watching their adventures through a video camera, and makes a new one.

 **Pairings:** Jimbo/Ned

 **Disclaimer:** I read this about 10 times, but I'm sure I missed some spelling mistakes. Italics means the voices are coming from the video camera.

 **Story Warnings:** gayness, uncles being uncles, dress up

Though the Kern household wasn't big on modern technology. That didn't necessarily mean they cut themselves off entirely from the outside world. They simply preferred to live a simpler life, before all the advancements in cell phones and the internet glueing everyone to a glowing blue screen.

The men still had the necessities, like running water, plumbing and electricity. A fireplace kept the log cabin warm in the winter and a beat up A/C kept them cool in the Colorado summer.

Besides a flat screen TV, the Kern household also had a simple landline. Ned's mother would call every now and again, while his six sisters would talk to anyone who picked up the phone. It also allowed the Marshes to ask for a babysitter without just dumping the kids off on the doorstep.

Jimbo managed to buy an old laptop off a man in town for a few hundred bucks. It was slow and ancient as a dinosaur, but it was something to watch porn on.

They also had a camera. Nothing fancy, just a simple point and shoot without any special innovations. It's flash didn't work, the shutter button was stuck and the lens was cracked. Yet it still managed to take photos. Jimbo often used it to photograph their kills, and take before and after photos of his progress working on the cabin. Other than that, it sat in the kitchen cupboard, untouched.

But something that was near and dear to the men's hearts, was a video camera.

The Marsh family got it as a Christmas present years ago. They hadn't been enthusiast at first, but as time went on, they never left home without it. It was beat to hell and back it, Stark's pond water still sloshed around in its gears, Jimbo had dropped it off a cliff and nearly ran over it with his truck. Yet through all the abuse, it held only a dent, and a crack in the corner of the screen.

Comfortably taking a seat on their bed, Ned flipped open the screen of the video camera and waited for the soft beep. The tape inside whirling and rewinding to the very beginning.

" _Ya get it working?"_

Jimbo.

" _Red lights on, I think that means it's recordin'."_

On the small screen, Jimbo appeared. A bit younger than he was now. His hair peeked out from beneath his orange hunting cap and he was wearing that ugly red Christmas sweater. Jimbo's mother; bless her heart, knitted that scratchy piece of crap as a special present to her son. Jimbo didn't have the heart to tell her no and wore it for days just to make his mother happy.

Christmas lights gave the screen a starry gleam before focusing on the large man once more. Jimbo was knelt beside their Christmas tree, fumbling with something as Ned toyed with the new camera's zoom.

Ned recalls that day, several years ago right after Christmas at the Marsh household.

" _Come on now, don't film me you piece crap."_ Jimbo grunted, realizing he was being recorded as he searched for a small, thin box hiding amongst the various presents strew under the tree.

Ned rolled his eyes but fondly watched the screen shake, his past self appearing as Jimbo took hold of the camera. He watched himself wave at the camera, face blank as Jimbo started to speak again.

" _Sharon said I should video tape you opening it for later. You don't care do ya?"_

The other expression didn't change, instead he gave a little shrug. Inhaling air into his throat with each word " _I, don't, mind."_

" _Ugh Ned don't burp talk, y'know it just sicks me out."_

Ned watched himself easily slid the lid off and freeze. Digging out the slim, black voice box with a growing grin. Automatically knowing exactly how to use it, " _Mnn- You son of a beeatch."_

Jimbo's hearty laugh shook the stillness of the footage.

" _This is the last damn time I'm buying you another voice box. Don't drink 15 beers and try to see how far you can chuck it this time. That's what the firewood is for."_

" _Mnn- I can't thank you enough for the new voice box."_ the smaller man admired his brand new electrolarynx and would certainly put it to good use later. The footage filmed the wall for a moment, quiet kissing noises filtered through the speakers. Ned found himself strangely embarrassed that their little makeout session was caught on camera.

" _Mnn- Merry Christmas Jimbo."_

" _Merry Christmas Ned. Let's crack open some cold ones and watch Bad Santa!"_

The screen became fuzzy as the tape focused on another scene. The screen became bright as a blue ocean and pearly white sand came into view. Unknown voices played through the speakers while seagulls chirped excitedly waiting for their next meal.

The screen zeroed in on Jimbo once again, struggling to hold the camera up and be sure he was in the shot, after a few fumbles and curses he spoke. " _Damn thing."_

His skin was pink from the start of a awful sunburn, his cheeks a dark red even with his signature hunters cap shielding his eyes from the sun. Even his ears were starting to burn as he sat on a beach towel beneath the sun's rays.

Ned felt himself snort at the horrible fumbling.

" _We're down here in Florida and it's hotter than all hell. How the hecke do people live here?! There's nothing to shoot besides these damn seagulls that keep tryin' to steal my keys."_

The larger man was shouting at a small bird that landed nearby to scare it off.

" _If only my shotgun would fit in these pants."_

The camera whirled around, this time Ned came into view, standing shin deep in the clear blue water. An unbuttoned Hawaiian shirt and a pair of black and white briefs decorated the smaller man's tanned body and it made Jimbo whistle, the camera began to zoom in on his speedo clad ass.

" _At least the view's great."_

Jimbo's swim trunks flashed on the screen before his face, a bright grin stretching his chapped lips. " _Anyway, We're gonna go fly fishin' later, but right now we're huntin' sea shells for the kids back home."_

With a grunt, Jimbo pushed himself to his feet, careful of the precious camera still capturing his adventure. With the screen focused on Ned as he approached, the larger man called to his bearded friend to get his attention. " _Find anything good Ned?"_

Ned gently shook the contents of the small bucket in hand, a few small shells, a conch and even a shark tooth rattled in the bucket.

" _Mn- nothing ground breaking."_

Luckily, they thought ahead and got a lanyard to strap the smaller man's voice box too. No way it was going to get washed away, the last thing they needed was the smaller man losing his voice box for their entire vacation.

Jimbo was one to abuse the zoom function, and did just that to the collection in the pail.

" _Mnn- found a dingle hopper though."_

" _The hell is a dingle hopper?"_

Neds stoic expression became hurt, digging into his pocket for a mangled, rusty fork.

" _Mn- You've seen the little Mermaid more than I have. You should be ashamed."_

Ned hit the fast forward button, Shelly's favorite movie at that time was the Little Mermaid and whenever their niece and nephew came over that was all she wanted to watch. Jimbo often was already on the couch and didn't feel like moving, so he would watch whatever the kids did.

Jimbo might not be a dad, but he sure would make a great one. Aside from all the guns and nearly putting vodka into Stan's baby bottle.

He had a knack for keeping the kids busy, whether it was with a coloring book or finding a game to play. He treated Stan and Shelly like they were his own. Jimbo was honestly was more involved in the kids lives than their own father sometimes. Both men went to Stan's plays, Shelly's volleyball games, and it certainly wouldn't be the first time he showed up to important school meetings.

His husband was incredibly sweet when he wanted to be, Jimbo often spoiled the kids with treats or small presents whenever they came over. Let's just say Jimbo can't say no to a pouty face, so the kids often got away with silly things.

Stopping the recording on another previous time in their life, Ned paused when he landed on a time he didn't recall. Jimbo was holding the camera awkwardly, face pale. From what he could gather, he was tucked into an unfamiliar bed.

" _I just wanted this be on camera."_

The camera tilted down and Neds hair came into shot. Lying awkwardly on ugly hospital sheets while Jimbo took up the only bed. His body was leaned forward, using Jimbo's leg as a makeshift pillow and the rest of him was seated in a plastic chair.

Screen tilting up, both men came into view, though the larger mans smile was tired, it still held a bit of affection as he gently ran his fingers through Ned's shaggy hair. With the poor lighting it was difficult to determine what time it was, however it was clear they were in the hospital. Judging by the date, it was days after Jimbo's heart attack.

Jimbo's face in question was looking a bit scraggly from lack of shaving, " _Ned ain't slept much since the accident, but he finally managed to fall asleep a bit ago."_

Once more it tilted, getting closer to the sleeping man whose soft breathing filtered through the speakers. Ned remembers snoring in his younger years. Though it wasn't quite as obnoxious as Jimbo's, it was something he hadn't thought about in a long time. Especially since losing his trachea.

Even with the dim lighting, there was the unmistakable, large, jagged scar forming on Jimbo's chest poking out from just beneath his hospital gown. " ' _M higher than a kite right now on all these pain killers, but I wanted to record him sleepin here. I keep tryin' to tell him to go home but he's bein' stubborn."_

His heart attack had been one of the most terrifying moments of not only Jimbo's life, but Ned's as well. Imagine having a great time with someone you care so deeply about, and you look over after hearing a thud and he's flopping like a fish, gasping for breath and curled over in pain. Your out in the middle of the woods, no phone, no people. It was miracle Ned got help in time.

Jimbo's face was drowsy, and a bit pained when Ned shifted slightly with a soft huff. The camera once tilted back up, " _You saved my life again buddie. Jesus, stop doin' that before you loose your other goddamn arm."_

Now this was interesting, did Jimbo even remember recording this? His slurred words and shaky hands said no. But Ned had yet to see this little bit of film, maybe Jimbo completely forgot he picked up the camera.

" _Stop doin' it ya hear? And quit worrying about me I'll be fine. If you think this is gonna put me down you gotta 'nother thing comin'."_

The camera was set down slightly, Jimbo absentmindedly running his fingers through his husband's hair as he tried to fight off exhaustion. But his eyes drooped, fumbling to find the off switch. " _How do you turn this thing off?"_

The video camera's screen quickly became static, flashing to show the the tape full, Ned quickly swapped out for another tape. Pretending his eyes weren't wet as the next scene played out before him. Soft music began to play all the while Ned sank further into his seat.

The screen shakily showed Ned, nicely groomed and cleaned up in a dark suit, his hair slicked out of his face, missing his signature bandana. His cheeks were red, nervously rubbing at his lost limb. It then panned to Jimbo standing at his side, dressed similarly, though his tuxedo was white. His hat no longer decorating his head, instead it was clenched in his fist, his face was redder than ever, nervously tugging on his collar that felt a bit too tight.

" _Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today-"_

Shelly was filming which explained the low angle, but Ned recalls how nervous their wedding day made them. How his collar was wet from sweat, and his body felt like it was on fire.

Absentmindedly, he toyed with the ring decorating his finger commemorating that momentous day. Their wedding had not been extravagant. In fact, it was the cheapest they could afford. They didn't need to spend thousands on a big wedding between two men. Unlike Mr. Slave and Big Gay Al, though their ceremony was enjoyable. Jimbo had been anxious the entire afternoon, his ears burned bright red, and he stumbled over his vows. Ned couldn't count how many times Jimbo mixed up his words and had to take a moment to simply to catch his breath.

His favorite part was kissing the groom. Jimbo nearly outright refused due to his nerves, his stomach was in knots and afraid he might heave right then and there. But with a tug of his jacket their lips came together and nothing could separate them.

It skipped to cutting the cake, Jimbo was cutting a small piece, carefully letting Ned steal a bite from his fork only to squish it against his face. The rest was history, they both ended up covered in cake and smiling like idiots. Whatever cake was left went to the kids, everyone else had wine and alcohol to celebrate.

Their close friends and family were the only ones invited, just as witnesses to their bonding. Other than that, no one ever knew, or cared to ask.

With a small smile stretching his lips, the bearded man used the camera to lead the way to the living room. Where the bear of a man laid fast asleep, snoring quietly with two small bundles curled on his chest.

This was the reason he initially got out their trusty video camera, but got sidetracked watching other parts of their life.

Ned quietly got closer to document the adorable display. Jimbo had been rocking Stanley to sleep just minutes before, the poor kid was whining and sniffling but his uncle managed to get him to fall asleep before he could have a hissy fit.

Shelly came along shortly after, demanding to play dress up with her uncle. She then started crying when Jimbo initially didn't play with her, mostly because of a sleeping Stan, so he let her put makeup on his face. Let's just say lipstick was everywhere but his lips.

In all honestly Ned wasn't sure where he got the makeup in the first place.

Voice box in his pocket, Ned squatted down to zoom in on Jimbo's sleeping face. Nothing was going to keep him from taking pictures for posterity. He slowly panned to the small baby curled up on the man's chest, suckling its thumb.

The smaller man could feel his chest warming at such an adorable sight. It wasn't every day he got to witness something so innocent.

Shelly was curled up on Jimbo's chest as well, taking up more room than her brother but their uncle's chest was large enough for the two of them. She got sleepy soon after her makeover, and once again, demanded to be rocked to sleep just like her brother.

They looked comfortable and Ned refused to let any creek of the floor boards startle any of the three awake. Finally turning off the camera and setting it aside He quietly began to tidy up, collecting the crayons sprawled across the floor and the dozens of pictures colored by the two.

He admired a sloppily drawn one of Jimbo and his bright orange hat. The character right beside had to be himself, missing the wrong arm and far shorter than the crude Jimbo. Scratchy lines created a mock cabin and a small line to represent smoke. He was definitely going to hang that on the fridge.

A soft psst, halted him in his tracks, finding Jimbo sleepily trying to get his attention. "Help me get these munchkins to bed so I can wipe this gunk off."

Without his glasses, Jimbo watched Ned roll his eyes and go for the video camera instead. Turning it on with a teasing smile.

"I'm warning you Ned."

Without a pause, Ned hit record once more.

Jimbo's face scrunched up in embarrassment, frowning heavily at his partner and biting his tongue to keep himself from saying anything to vulgar with the kids lying innocently on his chest.

"Just you wait bed head."

Ned's grin simply widened, holding the camera steady, taking sweet care to focus on Jimbo's pouting face, caught on camera with the kids and makeup all over his face.

Awkwardly, he pressed his voice box to his throat whilst still holding the camera, "Mnn- you look good Jimbo."

Jimbo seemed to be looking for an escape plan, but ceased his squirming and seethed at the other man. "Goddamnit Ned, jus-"

"Mnn- I wouldn't move too much, you know how fussy Stan is when he wakes up from his naps."

Jimbo ceased his squirming once more and outright scowled at the smaller man. Furiously trying to rub off the makeup staining his face, only to make it worse. He quickly gave the smaller man the finger in an effort to make himself feel better.

Feeling he milked this little moment enough, the smaller man gently scooped Stan off his uncle's chest, leaving Jimbo to carry Shelly to their spare bedroom. It was hard enough to carry one baby without two arms to hold them in place. As soon as the two were put down in the backroom. Ned spoke "Mnn- I need a beer."

Jimbo jumped, whirling around and shushed him just as he was shutting the door. "Christ Ned, doesn't that thing have volume control?"

"Mn- nope."

After a moment, Jimbo seemed to realize his words and snorted on a laugh "Oh right, heh, sorry."

The two went to the kitchen, tidying up the little rugrats mess. After grabbing empty juice boxes, and a few stray cans, Ned ventured to the kitchen. Finding Jimbo sorting through the fridge and pulling out two cold beers.

Generously popping the top off, Jimbo handed him one and enjoyed the silence.

Neds normally stoic expression held a small smirk, trying to hide it behind his can of beer.

Wiping his mouth after a long drink Jimbo gave him a weird look, completely forgetting about the makeup coloring his face. "What are you laughing at?"

"Mn- you look beautiful today Mr. Kern."

"GODDAMNIT!"


	5. Heart Attack

**Title:** Heart attack

 **SUMMARY:** Jimbo has a heart attack during a hunting trip.

 **Pairings:** Jimbo/Ned, Implied Randy/Shraon

 **Disclaimer:** I read this about 10 times, but I'm sure I missed some spelling mistakes.

 **Story Warnings:** gayness, drug mention

"Oh my god."

Stanley paused on a particularly annoying math problem to look at his mother. Her hand was cupped around her mouth as if to stifle her shock whilst the other hand clutched at the phone impossibly tight. Her round hazel eyes were impossibly wide, caught off guard by whatever she heard come through the receiver.

By the time she was done with her whispered conversation, Stan was done with his homework and ready to go play outside with his friends. Normally, he would have played along to find out what was going on, his mother didn't get upset often so seeing her so distressed was unnerving. But right now he had more important things on his mind, like playing 'poke the fish' with his friends.

Randy plopped himself on the couch only minutes after walking through the front door, a fizzing beer in one hand and bowl of chips in the other. Crumbs he was too lazy to sweep away decorated his shirt like a necklace of honor. His dad really was gross without even trying, the other day Stan discovered a half eaten bag of cheesy poofs stuck between the cushions, let's just say his dad kept them there for lazy days.

His dad's TV time was interrupted when Sharon place a hand on her husband's arm to get his attention, phone still clutched in her hand. Her voice was quiet, but forced.

"Randy, Jimbo's in the hospital."

His dad choked on a chip, punching his chest to dislodge the sharp shard. "Jimbo? Like Jimbo, Jimbo?"

Stan was on his way out when he stopped to listen in, Turning to face his parents who didn't seem to mind or care he was listening.

Sharon resisted the urge to get frustrated with her husband's ridiculousness but continued. "Yes Randy, your brother. I just got off the phone with Ned, he said Jimbo had a heart attack. He's being rushed to surgery right now, I guess they were out hunting and he suddenly was having a hard time breathing."

"Holy crap." his dad's hand went straight to his own chest, but shoveled another mouth full of chips past his lips. Speaking around a mouthful, "You think he's gonna be ok?"

Sharon looked appalled Randy even questioned it, that or the fact he felt the need to speak with his mouth full, spewing crumbs every which way, "I really hope so, I can only imagine what Ned's going through. You remember how much of a mess Jimbo was when Ned went into a coma."

Randy groaned, flipping through the TV channels as an excuse not to look his wife in the eye. "Great, if something happens to Jimbo no doubt that little guy will end up here."

"Of course he would stay with us! His family is all out of state where in the world would he go?."

"He's just weird, without Jimbo around the poor guy probably wouldn't talk to anyone."

Sharon smacked him on the shoulder, angry with her husband for being a douche to someone who was like part of the family. Not by blood but Ned was considered a Marsh despite this, he came to family reunions and brought the children presents for their birthdays. If anything he deserved a medal for putting up with the antics Stanley's family went through on a monthly basis.

Stanley shoved his hands into his pockets to meet Kyle on their way to Cartman's. Ever since Stan was little Jimbo always tried to involve himself in the Marsh family. Ned was his honorary uncle, at least that's what Jimbo called it. Unknowing to anyone really, Ned was actually really interesting to talk too when you gave him the time of day. It was weird to hear his father's stance on the smaller man, they didn't really talk much despite the many times they see each other. Randy didn't like to feel uncomfortable, he would stick his nose in his cup if they were the only two in the room or try to drown out the silence with the TV. Sometimes it was like he forgot how to talk to another human being. Maybe the voice box put him off, that was the case with a lot of people in South Park.

The next day, his mom insisted on making a get well card for his uncle. Which Stan still didn't understand. How was a card going to help Jimbo get any better? Why did he have to go in the first place? There was a perfectly fine fish he could be skewering right now.

It's not that he didn't want to see his Uncle Jimbo to find out if he was doing alright, in fact he was concerned. Who else was he going to blab to about his feelings like a broken record? Jimbo always offered an ear to talk to even if his advice almost always involved a gun. His uncle was more of of a father to him then Randy nowadays. He and Shelly spent few days a month up at Jimbo's so his parents could have some alone time. The real reason for his unease was having to visit the hospital..

There was no reason why hospitals weren't terrifying. The sterilized, overwhelming cleaning product smell. The brightly polished floors or the awful florescent lighting. Let's not get started in the hundreds of dangerous tools doctors will poke and probe you with, or the small cramp hospital rooms that were just tight enough to be claustrophobic.

Stan wasn't sure why he had to come along, completely at ease without having to experience the hospital again. But his mother insisted they visit Jimbo to make him feel better. Jimbo didn't have any extended family that would come visit him. His mother was sick in the hospital hours away and his real father walked out when he was a kid. Randy and _his_ family were all he had.

They even brought a few balloons and flowers along with his pathetic card. How was these supposed to help him? If anything it was going to make him feel like some kind of dying man sent to his death bed. Stan tried to explain that but his mom insisted they were going to do it, even if the overweight man hated it.

After talking to the receptionist, they found out Jimbo's room number. From what Stan managed to gather, he was out of surgery and resting. the Marshes held their breath when they opened the door. But much to their shock, Jimbo was awake. Though his eyes were droopy, no doubt on tons of pain medication. An IV was lodged in his arm, connected to a nearby bag surely pumping him full of steroids. And he was dressed in a hospital gown, a hospital band around his fat wrist proved this wasn't some kind of fever dream.

Ned was in a chair pulled up to the bed, but his glasses were on a nearby table. Curled over the edge of the bed, unable to see his eyes, Stan assumed he was asleep. Cups of coffee were scattered about, an full tray of food sat nearby on a table, untouched.

Jimbo slowly turned his head to see the door open, expecting another nurse to stuff him full of pain killers and blood thinngers, but a tired, enthusiastic smile appeared across his face.

"Good to see ya'll!"

His uncle's voice was airy, exhausted almost. Surely faking his enthusiasm having spotted the younger Marsh, "Try and be quiet if ya can, Ned ain't slept since I got here and he finally fell asleep a bit ago."

Randy was rubbing his head, venturing closer to his half brother and giving a low whistle at his siblings condition, "Good to see you're still in one piece buddie."

Jimbo's tired smile faltered, not moving to much with the blankets pulled up to his chest. "Glad to be in one piece, kinda." Nodding towards his chest. "Got about 60 stitches in my chest, they pretty much tore me in two."

Stanley cringed at the thought, "Gross dude." but had a childish determination to see it.

"What on earth happened Jimbo? Ned called yesterday and said you had a heart attack."

Jimbo took a breath, shifting in bed, but careful of the IV lodged in his arm. "We didn't find out what was wrong till I was rushed to the hospital, I had a damn heart attack. Flopped over like a fish outta water when we was out huntin' yesterday. All I remember was aiming for a deer and it felt like something shot me in the chest. Damn near thought some punk was after my buck and shot me instead."

Everyone made their own pained noise at the mental image, the silence was awkward and Stan was glad his mom spoke up again. She always took charge when everyone was unsure what to do. "We got you some flowers to brighten it up in here and Stanley made you a card." she nudged him forward to set the bouquet of flowers on the display table adjacent to the bed. "Shelly will be here a little later, she's at her friend's house just out of town."

"You got them for me? Y'all didn't have to, damn. I ain't dyin er nothing. Least not yet." he joked, keeping his voice quiet. Stan was the one to hand him the card, having scribbled get well soon in crayon all over the front. His uncle fondly admired the card, even if it was made less than an hour ago. The scribbled dinosaurs and words of wellness were all he needed from such a simple gift, "Aw, thanks kiddo, That sure means a lot." Jimbo was always weirdly sentimental, whether it was a dumb card or a stick figure drawing, Jimbo acted as if it was gold. Or maybe he just faked it, who knows.

Stan climbed into the other spare chair, shifting nervously seeing the IV stuck in his uncle's elbow. It made his stomach churn and forced himself to look away, focusing on his Jimbo's tired, sweaty face. "So do you think it will be a cool scar?"

"Stanley, please." Sharon's voice was sharp, automatically the boy crossed his arms in defense. No doubt wishing he wouldn't bother the man when he barely kept himself awake.

Jimbo made a face, glancing at Ned to see if they loud shout startled him awake, but he remained asleep. He gave a lazy grin, ignoring the mothers plead in order to entertain his nephews childish curiosity, "It ain't one yet, but it will be gross. They said it shouldn't scar but that's a load of bull hockey. Ain't no way this is gonna be good as new."

They chatted quietly for a while until Ned started to stir. Rubbing his eyes lazily as he pushed himself up from the awkward position. He looked awful, his hair looked messier than usual, he was slumped uncomfortably in the chair and the circles under his eyes aged him another ten years.

"Mornin' sleepy head, we got company." Jimbo greeted, Ned noticed the Marshes and slowly put his sunglasses back on, probably to block out the florescent lights. "Glad you could get a little sleep buddie, you had to have been up the last few days."

Ned fumbled for his voice box on the table "Mnn- you have no idea."

Jimbo looked sheepish for a second "Yeah, sorry. Didn't mean ta scare ya on purpose. Shoot all I remember was hitting the ground."

Ned sat up properly in his chair and waved at Stan and the others to acknowledge their presence. "You must have been terrified, if Randy ever collapsed I don't know what I would do."

Ned nodded rather than responding, "Mn- it had me shaking in my boots."

Jimbo's face contorted to a sheepish one, even with painkillers making him sluggish.

Sharon quietly spoke to her husband before asking, "Did you boys need anything? We're going to see if we can find out anything on your condition Jimbo. Hopefully find out when they will let you go home."

"Nah."

"Stan?"

"I'm ok mom."

"Ned?"

"Mnn- me too."

Stan was left alone with his uncles, he gave up just calling Ned, Ned. Uncle Jimbo and Uncle Ned seemed appropriate for a man that's been around the family since before he was conceived. He acted like any other uncle would, he gave Stan advice if need be, especially when Jimbo's fell short at being anything but destructive. The smaller man was at every family get together, and helped him with his history project months ago. The men offered a little getaway from home whenever they needed it, whether it was from fighting parents, overloaded on school or just looking for a day out.

"What did they do anyway? Did they cut your heart out?"

Jimbo didn't seem to mind the childish questions in the least, if his mother had been here, she would have tried to get him to stop bothering his uncle once again. Maybe even send him on a pointless mission to find some bandages, just to keep him busy.

"Hell no, least I hope not." he poked down at himself for a second. Though he appeared thoughtful, "To tell ya the truth I don't remember all that much. I just woke up here a little while ago."

It was Ned's turn to break in with his robotic voice. "Mn- the doctors said you had a blood clot." he paused to breath before going on, "Mnn- With your history it might be Ischemic heart disease."

Though Stan wasn't sure what that meant, Jimbo seemed to understand, and sagged into the crisp hospital sheets. Bitter all of a sudden at the strange diagnose. " _Of_ _course._ "

Jimbo lifted a hand to rub at his balding head, panicked when he realized his hat wasn't in its proper place. Once seeing it resting on a table nearby he relaxed, "Go to defend our people and our own damn country screws us over. I knew them damn pesticides were gonna kill us."

"What's is Is-is-lemick heart disease?" Stan asked, struggling to pronounce it.

Jimbo momentarily coughed, "it's a disease that fucks up your veins, during nam there was a gas called Agent Orange. We used it to kill the enemy's crops and the foliage." Stanley recalls the many times his uncles retold tales of their war days, it had been a different story every time. One involved horseback riding into an enemy camp, another was dive bombing a group of Viet Cong and fighting them off with swords.

This time it seemed a bit more serious. "You mean they tried to kill plants and stuff? What does that have to do with the disease?"

Jimbo toyed with the idea of nodding yes or no, and settled for a droopy frown. "Yeah, it was supposed to clear out the wooded area ta see the enemy camps, and kill off their crops so we could get the upper hand. But it didn't work like they thought it would. We was right in the middle of it all."

Jimbo's weight seemed to catch up with him and he sank further down into the sheets. "Think about it Stan, you got hundreds of men in those buses, not just enemies. We're breathing in the pesticides as they try and kill the area around us. It'd be like someone locking up you in a car and spewing smoke in your face with the windows up."

He looked like a grumpy child who wasn't ready for bed, Jimbo scrubbed at his face. "Now I probably won't make it past 60."

Neds sudden lash out caught Stan off guard and Jimbo let out a yelp in surprise, not expecting to get a light punch to his shoulder.

Stan turned his attention to Ned, whos usually unreadable expression was darker, more menacing than normal. His eyebrows were furrowed in a deep scowl, though his eyes were hidden behind his glasses Stan was sure they were spitting venom.

Jimbo gave a pathetic whine and cursed, choosing to glare at the TV rather than face Ned's bright blue eyes.

The boy could tell it must have been a previous argument, the way Jimbo refused to acknowledge his words upset his partner happened all the time with his parents. His mom and dad were at each other's throat constantly. They always assured him everything was fine and it was nothing to worry about. But compared to his Uncle Jimbo and Ned, what his parents had was unhealthy. Stan never saw his uncles argue, and if they did it was nothing more than a silly back and forth discussion. Anything more serious was never done in front of him and his sister. They were on the same page with almost everything. But Jimbo seemed to cross a line every now and again. Like he forgets Neds actually has feelings, or does not consider his view and dives head first into a dumb idea.

Looking like a kicked puppy, Jimbo refused to look in his lover's direction. Stan felt awkward in the couples silence and shifted on his chair, toying with his zipper.

"I'm Sorry ok?"

Jimbo finally broke the silence with a heavy sigh, lolling his head against the soft pillow in Ned's direction. "I didn't mean it."

Ned lost his own anger, letting Jimbo reach for his remaining hand. "Mn- I hate when you talk like that."

Jimbo shrank back "I know, I know, I'm just pissed off. I'm a big, fat old man who just had a damn heart attack and might have a damn veterans disease. Gimme a break buddie."

Ned pursed his lips but didn't respond.

They were getting old, nothing was all flowers and rainbows anymore. Their bodies ached and they simply couldn't do what they could in their younger days. The men had to accept the reality that they would be reaching their maker within the next few decades. Ned was having his own issues with arthritis, along with his awful habit of smoking it was all going to catch up with him, _again_. It was only a matter of time that Jimbo's health caught up with him too, especially being overweight.

Stan played on his phone awkwardly, not really doing anything besides swiping the screen to distract himself. The last thing he wanted was to interrupt their little spat, but the words tumbbled out before he could stop himself. "Are you gonna be ok Uncle Jimbo?"

Once again the two remembered they weren't quite alone, Jimbos hand retreated from a darkly skinned one, giving a sleepy, but cocky grin "A little heart attack ain't enough to take me down."

Both Ned and Stan let out a pleased sigh.

Stan knew his uncles were in a relationship, it was never said with so many words, but being around them so often it was like trying not to notice the color of a blue bird. They sat a bit too close on the couch, the shared a bedroom, Stan on more than one occasion happened to appear when they were whispering things to one another. Jimbo's face was always red and Neds small smile had him doing a 180 back where he came from.

He definitely didn't need to know what was going on in their bedroom, but he was happy to know Jimbo had someone to keep him company living all the way up in the mountains.

After what felt like ages, Jimbo tried to lighten the mood and get the smaller man to crack a smile.

"Did you at least bag that buck we were after?"

Ned rolled his eyes, but the corner of his lips curled as he bobbed his head, "Mnn- I shot it right _after_ I called 911."

"Thatta boy!"


	6. Heart Attack Aftermath

**Title:** Heart Attack Aftermath

 **SUMMARY:** Jimbo has a heart attack during a hunting trip, and after his family leaves he finally spills what he's really feeling on the inside.

 **Pairings:** Jimbo/Ned

 **Disclaimer:** I read this about 10 times, but I'm sure I missed some spelling mistakes. Possibly OOC but I really wanted to write Jimbo sorta spilling his heart out so bare with me.

 **Story Warnings:** gayness, drug mention

Stan and his family left hours ago, their small gifts still taking up space on the nearby table. But the boring TV shows weren't what was making Jimbo's mind buzz like a bee hive.

Ned managed to once again fall into a light sleep, which was a blessing of its own. The poor guy has been up for days waiting for Jimbo to wake from his surgery. As soon as he woke from his little cat nap Jimbo was going to force him to go home to at least change. There was no reason for him to put him through this anymore, not when he was awake in the care of dozens of nurses and doctors.

With nothing but the awful television program to keep him busy, the larger man absentmindedly ran his fingers through his lover's hair as he tried to fight off exhaustion. Finally realizing without a doubt: without Ned hunting with him that day, he wouldn't have survived.

"Jesus Ned, you saved me again."

Jimbo quietly spoke, watching the other face before making a slight frown.

"Stop doin' it ya hear? And quit worrying about me so much, If Viet Nam couldn't take me down then this won't either."

He was only talking to himself now, just to fill the silence. A strange sense of courage washed over the war veteran, and continued to spew things he never had the courage to say while Ned was awake. Whether it was the medication or the exhaustion giving him the bravery to spill his true feelings, nothing could stop him now.

"I don't gotta worry about you bud, you're more than capable of handling yourself, even without your fuckin arm."

Jimbo's attitude started to spiral, caught in an emotional torrent while his mind focused on repressed fears.

"I bet if you ever left you'd get married again, have kids and forget about me."

A soft sniffling and a violent wiping of his face filled the silence.

"I'd probably fall apart if you decided to leave, you've always been the real smart one and keepin' me outta trouble. 'S miracle you hung around with me all these years with all this shit I put you through."

Wiping his eyes while his other hand refused to venture far from the sleeping form beside him. Jimbo had to clear his throat which was starting to feel tight, "Without you I wouldn't be here Ned. I'd be in pieces scattered all round Nam. Ma would have cried till she fell asleep at night and Randy wouldn't have had anyone to teach him how to play football."

Jimbo struggled to hold back the flow of tears, sniffling pathetically as he nose began to run. Ned rarely gets to see Jimbo so distraught. Sure he was a bit of a softy and cried during sad movies and when his dog died. But when it involved such a serious topic, those were the times Jimbo did his best to hide his feelings. With pain killers in his system making him tired and loopy, Jimbo didn't seem to have a filter and continued on his rant.

"I- I love you so goddamn much and I know it's _gay_ and _wrong_ but I do, I really do."

His voice cracked, but kept it quiet. "You'd be fine without me I know you would, but I want you to know I wouldn't be the same without you buddie. You're my best friend, I mean I married you for crying out loud so there's something wrong with me."

His breath caught and Jimbo seemed to growl at himself for being so emotional. Silence went on for several minutes, the larger man tried to compose himself before he managed to wake the smaller form sleeping beside his bed.

"But don't think I wouldn't be able to function if decided to leave. If you left me I would understand. I mean I ain't a looker, I'm an overweight faggot, I have big dumb ears, and sound like I have a cold. I'm even going bald for Christ's sake." He seemed to get quieter with every word. Until silence once again filled the hospital room besides Neds gentle breathing. Without his hat Jimbo's free hand ran through his thinning hair, feeling vulnerable without being able to tug the rim down to hide his eyes.

"But you're so handsome, you're the strong silent type and women love that. You have real pretty eyes and your funny as hell." he reminisced in all the things he enjoyed about his lover, fondly watching the others chest rise and fall.

"You'd be fine, I'd probably still live up in the mountains and have stories about me. How I'm some ugly fuck that got dumped and turned to murdering innocent animals for a rush or somethin'."

Still gently teasing Neds hair, Jimbo affectionately watched him sleep. After a long deep sigh he spoke again, finally letting exhaustion win the struggle. Shifting deeper under the covers, the larger man closed his eyes, mumbling. "You've put up with me this long, I hope you ain't goin anywhere Ned. I can't imagine livin' without you."


	7. Supper Time

**Title:** Supper Time

 **SUMMARY:** Ned is the cooking master in their little cabin

 **Pairings:** Jimbo/Ned

 **Disclaimer:** I read this about 10 times, but I'm sure I missed some spelling mistakes.

 **Story Warnings:** gayness

Placing several sliced potatoes into a boiling stew, Ned gently placed the lid over the pot to let it's contents simmer. Nothing quite beat homemade beef stew, especially when the meat was fresh from a deer they shot this morning. A home killed, home cooked meal always tasted that much sweeter.

Wiping his hand on a nearby towel, the smaller man began to tidy up, placing dishes in the sink and wiping up any fluids that managed to escape from the boiling stew. The front door opened and closed, yet he didn't find the need to check on who came through the front door. It could only be one person after all, and if it happened to be a bear that learned how to turn door knobs, there was a double barrel shotgun just a few feet away.

However, he did mind the hairy arm suddenly sneaking into view, and like lightning Ned smacked the creeping hand with a spoon. Keeping the other man's hands far away from the steaming apple pie cooling on the counter.

"God damnit!"

Ned turned to frown at the assailant, rubbing the abused spot tenderly, "Jeez, use the spatial next time, maybe it'll miss my knuckle."

Ned did give the other sympathy as he gathered the sweet desert into his only hand and away from a drooling Jimbo. After placing it on the dinner table, he pressed his voice box to his throat. "Mn- you'll spoil your dinner."

Jimbo pursed his lips and huffed, childishly sucking the abused spot on his knuckle. "I'm a grown ass man, I can eat whatever I want."

Without pause, Ned patted Jimbo's rather large gut, cocking an innocent smile.

"I know I'm fat, but you better keep your cancer kazoo quiet buddie boy." teasing the others sides and taking a peek at the contents of the steaming pot.

Jimbo was missing his hat, that certainly was a rare occurrence even in the privacy of their own home. The big guy was a tad self conscious of his balding head, he used that old hat like some kind of security blanket.

"Mn- any luck out there?" Ned's voice box made his words robotic, yet it didn't phase the other hunter in the least.

At his side, Jimbo held up a small bucket filled with a handful of fresh eggs and fresh vegetables from the garden just out back. "Barely, We're gonna have to fix the chicken coop, those damn raccoons are tearin' up the fence again. The hens are gettin' spooked."

Ned merely nodded, taking the pot off the stove while Jimbo retold his little adventure.

Over the years they made their lives more fulfilling by living off the land. Not entirely, they couldn't survive without their flat screen TV or the microwave. They built a chicken coop years ago and now had 5 hens and a rooster producing fresh eggs almost daily. Add that with the small garden growing out back and the many pounds of meat they bring in weekly from their hunting trips, they always had a reason not to go grocery shopping. However poptarts, beer and chip dip always had them crawling back whenever supplies got low.

Jimbo was shedding an extra layer of clothes, laying his heavy jacket on the back of a nearby chair. He came close to the other man, working around him smoothly to set the table while the other worked on putting dirty pots into the sink. Ned took a glance at the larger man, without his hunting cap shadowing his eyes, the war veteran looked older. The wrinkles in the corner of his eyes weren't shrouded in shadows and his dimples looked sore from his constant idiotic smiles. His graying hair was a sight to behold, the man's sideburns were starting to fade, and his hairline was receding under his hat.

Ned hid the smile curling the corners of his lips and turned off the stove to prepare for dinner.

"Mnn- I made beef stew, and some loaded potato, shucked corn and squash."

Jimbo gave a happy moan, sidling up to his smaller lover once more, stealing a spoon full from the boiling pot.

Watching the instant regret burst across his face made Ned snicker, "Woo nelly that's hot! You wanna beer? Nothing goes better with your pie than a cold brewski."

"Mnn- Sure."

Jimbo was kind enough to pop the top off of Neds beer after stealing them from the fridge. While the chef of the Kern household got the silverware, Jimbo took a few steps forwards, heavy against the hardwood floor with his boots still adoring his feet. Once again pressing close, and affectionately lifting his glasses off the bridge of Ned's nose to see those pale blue eyes. "Wanna play strip poker after supper?"

Ned cocked his head slightly, resting his chin against Jimbo's wide chest. Worming a hand back to his throat.

"Mnn- only if you plan to lose."

An idiotic grin split across the other man's face, "There is no loser in strip poker old pal'o mine." Jimbo's hand fell to the small of Ned's back sneaking beneath his sweatshirt, waggling his eyebrows. "If one of us ends up naked, that's a win in my book."


	8. Spaghetti and Meatballs

**Title:** Spaghetti and Meatballs

 **SUMMARY:** Jimbo prepares a nice dinner for Ned, and wants to pop the question.

 **Pairings:** Jimbo/Ned

 **Disclaimer:** I read this about 10 times, but I'm sure I missed some spelling mistakes. Based on this post from tumblr

 **Story Warnings:** gayness

Dinner was a complete disaster, yet it still managed to look as if god himself set the table.

Jimbo spent all day preparing, yet it became obvious Ned was the chef in the Kern household. Anything from stir fry to simple bacon and eggs, Ned was the master of the kitchen. So it quickly became apparent that the kitchen was a minefield, the large man felt out of his element fixing fancy spices and things he never even heard of into a boiling pot of water.

He spent what felt like hours in the grocery store. Walking up and down the aisles in hope of finding something simple, and easy to make that wasn't mac and cheese or a frozen dinner. Whether it was luck or misfortune however, a grocery store clerk found him staring blankly at cans of soup and asked if he needed assistance. Awkward small talk was not the the overweight man's forte. In fact, just to end it he walked out with more ingredients than he would ever hope to use. The young man suggested an easy to make spaghetti recipe and pursued to help him track down the ingredients, the boy had no idea Jimbo could hardly prepare a grilled cheese without the charing the bread, how was he supposed to make spaghetti?

The clerk had been helpful despite all the weird questions, after nearly interrogating Jimbo, making the hunter more awkward than he already was asking for help for a fancy dinner. He walked out with everything he needed to start his special dinner. Luckily the boy didn't ask who it was for, all he knew was it was a special occasion and it needed to be enough for two.

He planned to finally ask Ned to marry him. But he had to get to that moment first, no doubt he would manage to chicken out after going through all this trouble.

The thought of marriage was almost unsettling, they were happy now without rings or vows to prove they were committed to one another. However, he wanted Ned to feel how he felt. Willing to bypass his insecurity and finally show he didn't need the approval from anyone or their feelings when it came to their relationship. In all honestly he was still scared shitless for the outcome if Ned did say yes, but he would figure out all the details later.

The table was stripped of its usual centerpiece. Nothing more than their salt and pepper shakers and in its place, a soft tablecloth draped neatly over the smooth wooden surface. Jimbo couldn't find a vase for the pathetic wild flowers he picked just outside their cabin and several times he tossed them in the trash, only moments later to dig them out and try to straighten their ruffled petals. It was too much, it had to be. They had a damn bear skin rug in front of their fireplace, flowers were a bit of an over kill. Ned would surely suspect something was up seeing ruffled tulips between two mounds of spaghetti. Let alone it was a little out of character for either of them to give a crap about flowers.

The smaller man was out with Sharon and the kids. It was some kind of miracle Jimbo convinced him to spend time with the family without Jimbo by his side as the buffer. Let alone how hard it was to convince Sharon to take Ned with her. He practically begged Randy's wife to call their home and ask if Ned wanted to go. After promising to babysit Stan and Shelly later that week, his plan was set into motion. Jimbo was there to cast him off, and as soon as the tires kicked up dirt back down the path, the hunter hopped into his truck and down to the grocery store.

It was only reasonable to have him along, not only to spend time with the kids but he was also a fantastic baby sister. He might not be able to talk much or do as many tasks as he used to, but he was great at watching over the kids. He was quick and always managed to have an eye on them even if he wasn't looking in their direction. Sharon was going to thank him for the help later on, no doubt about it.

Nearly burning down the cabin, dropping several eggs and managing to ruin one of their good pans, Jimbo finally had his dinner prepared. The table was set with their best plates while candle littered around to give a romantic atmosphere. Though he found himself chewing on his lower lip nervously. It just looked too nice, too girly in fact. Regrettably he tossed the flowers out once more, and started to put the candles back into a junk drawer just as he heard a car horn blare in their driveway and his heart jumped. It was only eight, they weren't supposed to be back to late.

Jimbo was greeted at the door by Ned himself, waving at the small family piled in a old sedan. Even from the distance he could see little Stan sleeping in his car seat and Shelly's face illuminated by a child's tablet.

No time was wasted, as soon as the door swung closed Jimbo lathered the other man with affection. His grocery bag full of goodies forgotten in a chaste kiss.

"How's the trip? Bring me anythin' good? I sure am hurtin' for some new socks." Jimbo teased, thumbing at the edges of Ned's worn jeans.

"Mn- lots of shopping." he took a breath from the array of kisses, pressing his voice box to his throat. "Mng- nope, it's all for me."

Jimbo grinned, herding the other into the living room, but Ned's focus wasn't on the freshly cleaned quilt or the roaring fireplace, it was just over Jimbo's shoulder. Instant regret washed over the hunter, forgetting to turn the lights off and let it be a complete surprise when they went to 'start' dinner. Ned gave a lazy, suspicious look. Jimbo was notoriously lazy when it came to setting the table, half the time they moved to the couch and watched TV while they ate. Which in all honestly was nice, they didn't have to wipe down the table afterward.

"What? Can't a guy just make a nice dinner without bein' interrogated?"

Jimbo urged Ned to share in his purchases to bide his time for tonight. With the man now in his sights it was like his brain was in a frenzy, the longer it took for him to pop the question the more flustered he became. He ran the scenario through his mind time and time again, and each time he managed to find himself droning on about nothing and skipping the important parts of his speech. He even went as far as to think of Ned's reaction, or what happens if he says no.

It quickly became apparent it was impossible to keep Ned out of the kitchen, hearing his belly growl. Expertly maneuvering around the overweight man to inspect the meal. The noodles were a bit overcooked and there was way too much garlic for his liking, but it didn't stop Ned from twirling it on his fork and enjoying a meal he didn't have to prepare. Both men were seated at the table, Jimbo didn't bother to light the candles with the shakiness of his fingers. Words were caught in his throat, creating a hot knot that refused to be swallowed. Sweat began to wet his brow, trailing down the length of his neck. Without his hat, it was impossible to hide the nervous expression straining his face.

The large man's face was flushed a dark red that spread all the way to his the tips of his ears to the nape of his neck. Jimbo gaped like a fish several times, forcing another fork full of spaghetti past his lips to pretend he wasn't struggling to speak his mind, intern he struggled with his food.

Ned found a unnoticeable smile curling at his lips watching the blundering man before him turn redder than a tomato, hands sweaty and struggling to act cool as his grip on his fork slipped. The forced small talk about the weather had him silently chuckling.

After another nonsensical question about the daily news, Ned reached over to grab his voice box, pressing it to his throat once more. "Mngg- Will you marry me, Jimbo?"

The larger man choked, luckily on his own breath and not a stray noodle. Stunned, he watched the short man across from him smile, glasses catching the light mischievously.

"Will _you_ marry me?"

"Mn- I asked you first."

He choked again, embarrassed he even thought about it in the first place, pointing his fork in the man's direction. "Aw hell no, I set all this crap up just to ask you that question. Now are you gonna marry my dumb ass 'er not?"

The grin spreading across Ned's face was almost scary, he didn't show much emotion now a days so seeing him all giddy was almost unnerving, "Mn- where's my ring?" toying with his voice box absentmindedly, while giving Jimbo an expectant look.

For a moment Jimbo was quiet, like he forgot he was upset moments ago. His dark brown eyes watching his soon to be fiance as if he grew a second head. His jaw suddenly dropped, and slapped himself in the forehead, voice barely coming out a whisper, "Oh my god, I forgot the rings."


	9. God be Damned

Title: God be Damned

Summary: Jimbo stops at the local church to get something off his chest.

Pairings: implied Jimbo/Ned

Disclaimer: I read this about 10 times, but I'm sure I missed some spelling mistakes.

Story Warnings: Jimbo discovering his pent up feelings.

Afternoons in South Park were normally filled with outrageous shenanigans involving the town and its people. Just yesterday the children were trying to protest against homework for what felt like the millionth time this month. But today was quiet. The cul-de-sac was alive with the sounds of the children playing together while the rest of the citizens enjoyed the cool day amongst the dozens of shops littering the streets of South Park.

It was like stepping back in time, driving down the uneven streets. No crazy riots, or outrageous monster trying to stomp down the town. Even for a town known for a piece of shit to rise up from the sewers and sing christmas carols, nothing seemed out of the ordinary. A few familiar faces greeted Jimbo as he drove by the grocery store in his worn down truck. Like any other small town, many of its residents knew one another by name. It was always fun to curse someone's name when they took too long at a red light.

But despite today's wonderful sunshine, Jimbo was on a mission to give the church a quick visit before heading home for the day.

Without the seats lined with women in their finest dresses and men in their Sunday vests, the inside of the St. Jude church felt much roomier without all the chatter from the townspeople. Normally there were a few drunken stragglers, confessing their sins and mistakes to father Maxi yet it was eerily silent. The echo of his heavy steps sent a chill up his own spine, the afternoon orange beams reflecting off the stain glass windows casting marvelous light shows on the tiled floor.

Jimbo took a seat near the rear of the building. The silence was almost overwhelming as his ears began to ring. Surely father Maxi was in the back room doing paperwork, Yet it was quiet enough to hear a pin drop. A dusty old church was no place to spend a surprisingly warm afternoon up in the mountains.

Taking a steady breath, the large man removed his hat to pay his respects in the house of god.

Now, Jimbo Kern wasn't necessarily a huge believer of going to church. If you're a good person now, and pay your respects when necessarily you didn't need to go to church every Sunday was a code he lived by. Sure he and Ned would come every now and again and sometimes Jimbo chose to come on his own, much like today.

Religion was always a sensitive topic in a their small little town. Christianity was the widespread belief, save for a few others sprinkled in. Jimbo himself liked to believe their was something bigger than himself. Whether it was God, Jesus, Buddha, or some magic cat pulling the strings of fate.

Clutching his hat and clearing his dry throat, the man wiped his sweaty palms on his jeans. Finding himself glancing to his left to the empty benches, Ned always prefered to sit by his left side.

Speaking of the older man, he chose to stay home today. Catching up on his crime shows instead of going to the bar to watch the game with their football buddies.

Jimbo caught himself a few times turning to joke with his best friend during the game, only to be met with confused glances from strangers.

It was such an odd sensation, the two men had their own lives outside the cabin they called home. Ned liked to have tea with Mrs. Cartman every now and again, while Jimbo went on solo hunting trips every winter. They needed their time apart every so often, so it wasn't an issue when Jimbo wasn't with Ned, or vise versa. But like idiots, their drinking buddies would tease him about why Ned wasn't at his side.

" _How's it feel to be 100 pounds lighter without that sad sack stuck to your side?"_

" _Where's Tweedle Dee?"_

" _Are you guys fighting again? Lovers quarrel?"_

But there lied the problem, Jimbo's problem. The whole reason he was in this shitty church in the first place.

Ned.

Ever since their service, Jimbo and Ned have been doing everything together and thriving. Now living comfortably in a homemade cabin, they didn't have to worry about their past. Afterall they made it through thick and thin, during Vietnam they leaned on one another for comfort, traded cigarettes and shared sleeping bag when the nights chilled them to the bone. Ned even sacrificed his arm to save Jimbo's life so many years ago.

And what friendship would be complete without dragging one another to bed when they were blackout drunk.

It was impossible not to be close after what the men had been through. Enduring more pain and suffering than anyone should ever have to in a lifetime, and they had the nightmares to prove it.

But somehow explaining his feelings was one of the most difficult tasks of his life. Especially considering Jimbo never cared to express his emotions and be seen as a wimp to his younger brother or any of the other men in South Park.

The only way he could explain it was a strange ache in his chest that burst into warmth whenever Ned was near.

It was never an issue to see or even talk to his buddy, Ned. So the ache never lasted too long. The guy was just down the hall. But the ache would return as soon as Ned was gone. All the while his mind would be focused on his best friend. What he might be making for dinner, if he heard about the new Taco Bell opening just out of town, or if the guy would like to watch Ghostbusters tonight.

The times he did spend with Ned were so comfortable he often forgot he wasn't the only one taking up space on the couch. Jimbo never feared the other man judging him, secrets were a thing of the past after nearly a lifetime of friendship. But that cozy warmth grew one day into an embarrassing heat.

Jimbo had seen Ned naked before, it was inevitable. In the Kern household it was completely normal for two men to walk about in their skivvies or just plain naked as the day they were born. Totally. Jimbo had to admit he was a little shy at first, while Ned would parade around like he owned the world. More power to the little guy.

It had been a chilly day that quickly became a mess. With the fireplace roaring, Jimbo flipped through the channels lazily as his body throbbed. They had just returned from a tiring hunting trip when the weather turned sour and neither men found the energy to shower away the dirt and sweat collected through the day. They simply changed into some comfy clothes and intended to watch some old movies before bed.

A little curious glance at his friends movement and Jimbo was caught like a butterfly in a net. Ned looked oddly different, not that he was freshly shaven or clean from a warm shower. Considering neither of them had the energy to do such a thing right now. No matter how hard he focused he couldn't pinpoint what exactly was different. He nearly asked if he got a haircut but quickly snapped his lips shut. How idiotic of him.

The strange warmth spread through his chest and made heat rise up to his chubby cheeks, he cursed the fire popping several feet away but he was still captivated by the way his friend moved. Quiet as a mouse since their war days. Ned was a string bean compared to Jimbo's rather enormous gut. But over the years Neds remaining arm has gained a definitive muscle lugging firewood and managing to handle guns without the aid of another arm. The larger man found his eyes roaming the other strong back and admiring Neds compact, yet obvious muscle definition.

As soon as the smaller man turned to speak through his voice box, Jimbo refused to acknowledge him while he paraded around the room looking for his cigarettes. A knot formed in his throat that refused to be swallowed while his palms sweat profusely, wiping them on the soft cushions beneath him.

Jimbo had turned away that night, focusing back on the flashing television. Feeling his cheeks burn in embarrassment and his chest tighten. He just looked Ned up and down like he was a piece of meat. It wasn't until a short time after did he realize exactly what he had done and grabbed his gun to shoot at anything that moved out back. A distraction from anything his mind might be trying to do, it worked. For the time being.

Despite it being an odd experience, It was nothing he really dwelled on, any new feelings were buried beneath years of affection he and his best friend displayed even in the darkest times when they finally broke down during the dark nights back in Vietnam.

There was no harm in appreciating another man's physique. Right?

Mrs. Tenorman unknowingly changed everything. (Bless her soul.)

Helping out Stan's little friend was just to pass along his hunting tips to the kids. Cartman explained it was to get back at the red haired teen for stealing his sixteen dollars. If he had known Eric's true intentions, Jimbo never would have helped the little shit.

One thing lead to another, and long story short, Spying on the Tenorman's lead to seeing Mrs. Tenorman without her bra. She did indeed have luscious breasts, and as soon as Ned saw. He immediately started jacking off.

And a strange knot in his belly had him snapping at him to stop. Jimbo was never a jealous man, actually, he never really had anything to be jealous for. Yet that day seeing Ned enjoying himself brought an uncomfortable sense bubbling in his belly.

It wasn't the fact Ned was jacking it in the bushes he decided. They had jerked off around one another a few times with some good porn. It didn't bother him in the least, yet with Ned's lip caught between his teeth and watching Mrs. Tenorman undress seemed to be the cause of the unwanted feeling.

As strange as it may sound, Ned was a charmer when it came to the ladies. Always respectful even if the situation turned sour.

He mulled over the feelings later that night. Unable to sleep as he tossed and turned. Why did he get so anger? His turmoil was answering to the silence of their cabin, crickets chirped relentlessly just outside the window, and Jimbo found himself questioning if Ned was asleep, and just how he slept in his single bed just a few doors down.

Perhaps it was jealousy, or maybe he was just homophobic all of a sudden. Seeing another man touch himself was considered gay right? What else could explain the churn in his belly watching Ned jack it in the Tenorman's front yard?

But that didn't make any damn sense considering he had seen Ned in more compromising positions than he would ever be willing to admit. He never felt the hot shot of rage in his veins like that before.

What disturbed the hunter the most was the longer he analyzed the situation, the more he caught little details. Like he didn't exactly stop Ned. Sure he might have snapped, but he didn't exactly take away the binoculars. It's not like Ned could have held them and touched himself at the same time. All he had to do was put his hand down, but he remained in place to let the other enjoy himself.

However, that was only one of the instances that had his insides burning.

The two men had recently taken to helping Ms. Cartman out with her rodent problem, in turn she baked them sweet treats. However it wouldn't be the first time he caught Ned getting a little too friendly with South Parks local whore.

Jimbo would be a hypocrite to say anything about the woman, after all he did sleep with her many years ago during the drunken barn dance. With no disrespect to a woman trying to provide for her boy, he has been so drunk he couldn't tell up from down, and regretted that drunken decision the moment he came to the next morning.

Yet, as he was hammering nails into the floorboard to replace the ruined chunks of wood those damn rat had gnawed through, catching sight of Ned giving her that charming smile as she offered him ice cold lemonade, a hot spike shot through his belly, let's just say the hammer missed the nail and made him howl louder than a wounded dog.

The larger man leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and entwining his fingers. With his head low, he began to speak to the silent church.

"Hey god, if ya'll up there gotta minute, I'd sure appreciate it." he started awkwardly, keeping his voice quiet in order to prevent an echo. The last thing he wanted was for anyone to know about this. He already felt his skin crawling at just the implication of his words. Yet a rush of excitement flooded him to finally speak what was on his mind for so long.

"First I'd like to say sorry for not praying all the time, or comin ta church every Sunday." he was met with more silence, after not being stricken down by lightning, he continued.

"But I've been feeling weird the past few months. Maybe longer, I ain't so sure." with his hat the only witness to his words, the overweight man took another deep breath. Ned always said he wasn't the most observant.

"Ned and I been best friends since nam' I can't think about how I'd still be here without him sleeping just down the hall."

"Jesus help me, I know I ask you for stupid shit, but this time I really need your help."

His voice shook, but cleared his throat to steady himself. "I'm real confused, I keep seein' him and getting this weird twist in my gut. 'S always when he's flirtin' with the woman 'round here." Now that he said it out loud it left a bad taste on his tongue.

"Whenever he's around, I'm comfortable as can be. I never really thought much about it. But now with Mrs. Tenorman gone, that night has haunted me since her funeral. I got so mad at my best friend for just enjoying himself. And ever since then I get this weird feeling everytime he's around."

"Ned's my best friend in the whole wide world, and I can't stand the thought suddenly being put off by him just cause he's trying ta score."

Sure they did argue on a few subjects every once in a blue moon, but no one ever stuck around long enough to get to know Jimbo like Ned had. They made it this far, and suddenly the thought of Ned finding a loving wife and moving away made his heart ache and brain short circuit. The overweight man squeezed his hat and grit his teeth at the terrifying thought of watching his best friend, his only true friend move away with a wife and kids in tow, leaving him behind to freeze in his god forsaken home town.

Suddenly his brain took a u-turn, desperately needing a distraction before hot angry tears could sting his eyes. What if Ned was gay? Or at least Bisexual. That was a thing right? Jimbo couldn't bring himself to care if Ned was either. The older man was still his best friend, and it wouldn't change anything. He would learn to accept his friend the way he was just like Ned but up with his lazy ways.

It was their bar buddies that would say something.

A door clicked, and Jimbo's lips melted togethers like hot wax. Father Maxi appeared from the back room, dressed in his normal black robes and collar. Maxi was one of the few people in South Park Jimbo had mixed feelings about. The man had several instances where he was caught in the act of not only adultery, but caught in a few graphic acts of homosexuality. How did anyone put their future in this man's hands? Maxi was supposed to be a messenger of god if the bible said anything.

The Bible did hold some horrible things he couldn't agree with. So he loosely accepted Christianity simply because the only ones he called family went to church. Knowing there was something watching over him made his already stumbling heart beat a little easier. Who else was he gonna beg for luck when his bets were coming in? Oprah?

So to have someone who's only job is to present the words of god, help those whose lives have become corrupt, and turn around and break dozens of rules almost pissed him off enough not to come to church anymore.

The Priest caught sight of him, and he greeted him from across the way, luckily didn't rush over to his spot. Damn his bright orange hunting shirt. Despite the overwhelming feeling to return his signature cap to his balding head, Jimbo let it sit limp by his side out of respect for the corrupt priest. For now.

"How are we today Jimbo? It's been awhile since I've seen you in church."

Awkwardly, the fatter man chuckled. Finally leaning back off his knees. "Me and Ned been busy fixin' up the cabin. Any of our free time nowadays goes to the bar and manning the shop."

Maxi gave a sickening smile, "Well be sure to stop by again soon, I'm sure you both could use your daily dose of Jesus Christ."

Ned didn't hate anyone honestly, he held a strong dislike and distrust of many but not necessarily hate. Yet Maxi was the exception he refused to speak with the man, confess, anything that had to do with his over all way of thinking. Another big reason the men hardly ever swung by the church anymore.

"What brings you here today? Did you need to confess your sins before you burn in the fiery depths of hell?"

Jimbo had to prevent himself from cringing, wringing his hands together nervously. Knowing Satan was miles beneath their feet put a knot in his throat. "Nah, not today. Just came to rant a bit. Skeeter's outta town otherwise I would just blabber to him down at the bar."

"Well I'm always here to listens to your confessions."

Jimbo again a resisted groan, he didn't actually want anyone to hear him. This whole stupid idea was just to get everything off his chest. He would have just babbled at the bar but everyone was busy with their families. Skeeter was even out of town. No one but the bartender that was quieter than a goddamn flea. At least Skeeter would have pretended to listen.

"Aw hell, it's nothing you have to hear Maxi, it's not really confessing I just got nobody to talk too."

The man gave a award winning smile "As far as I'm concerned you are also a friend, what's the matter?"

Jimbo resisted getting up and blew out a breath, already put off by the others persistence. "Ya know, uh, it's sorta hard to explain."

"I'm all ears!"

Now was not the time to scream, "Uh, I just got a close friend that I've known for while. We hang out regularly. And the other day I saw 'em with someone else and I got upset."

The man's eyes lit up and smiled widely, "Jimbo Kern having relationship trouble? Didn't even know you were seeing someone. You sly dog. Who is she?"

Taken aback by the complete misunderstanding, the hunter cleared his throat and decided not to correct the priest just in case something goes wrong.

"It's not like that, but I guess."

How quickly the man went from menacing provider of god to an everyday buddie was disturbing and making Jimbo uncomfortable the longer he sat still. Not considering the fact he automatically jumped to a relationship issue.

Jimbo gulped, tugging at the collar of his bright orange hunting shirt. The presence felt a little constricting with Maxi's eyes on him, and his tongue refused to correct him. Refusing to say it was Ned and not some secret lover.

"Oh you know, a gal from outta town. But that's not the point Maxi. It ain't like that, we're real close, but not dating 'er nothin. But we were hangin' out and h- she started getting friendly with some guy." thank god he didn't stutter along with words like an idiot. "I guess I was mad she wasn't hanging out with me. Ain't no big deal, honest."

He chuckled lightly, trying to play off the subject yet managed to convince himself of the same thing. That had to be it. He wasn't suddenly homophobic, he was just angry Ned's attention wasn't on him. How childish. They were together 24/7. It was stupid to get agitated for flirting with women.

Maxi's eyes were wide, his long fingers softly drumming against the thick binding to his bible. "Angry? It sounds to me as if you might have been jealous Jimbo. You saw her with another man, and got upset. You obviously have some pent up feelings for this little lady."

Jimbos heart leap to his throat, and he stuttered for a moment, catching the words scattering again his tongue. "I don't think that's possible father."

The man intertwined his hands protectively against the holy book set against his breast. "Jimbo, I've never seen you interested in another woman, maybe you should see how she feels. If you've been this close for so long perhaps she's developed feelings for you as well. The love of a woman is irreplaceable." the punctuation in his words sounded like he was trying to convince himself.

Jimbo clamped his mouth shut, unable to bring himself to look at father Maxi as what he could only describe as hot shame shot up his spin.

 _Oh god._

That was impossible, he couldn't be jealous that Ned was jacking it to Mrs. Tenorman. Physically incapable, non existent. Because that means he wanted Ned to look at him, and not a pair of soft breasts.

With his head in hands, Jimbo felt as if the walls grew eyes, judging his inner turmoil whilst the priest had no idea he wasn't actually talking about some beautiful woman who tickled Jimbo Kern's fancy.

A hand patted his back, and he jerked slightly, "My son, I'm not a counselor to aid you through a relationship, But it's worth a shot? Besides what's the worst that could happen?"

Exile, losing my best friend, losing my shop, being labeled a faggot.

 _Loosing Everything._

Jimbo forced a smile that barely curled the corners of his lips, jumping to his feet in a quick movement. "I'll think about it. Thanks, I guess."

"Be sure to-"

Jimbo didn't even bother to listen, his feet automatically taking him far away from the judging eyes of the statues and crosses. He hardly remembers the icy sidewalk or jumping into his truck until he found himself staring off into the distance as snow once again to fall from the sky in thick clumps.

Maxi was just crazy, there was no way in hell he was jealous of Ned giving those women attention. It doesn't work like that. He loved his best friend dearly, but not in a romantic way. There was no possible way those feelings were jealousy.

Sure, they did everything together, and he hoped to do more as the years wore on. Yet Jimbo's fingers turned white as he grasped the steering wheel of his hummer. There had to be a logical explanation.

He wasn't gay.

He wasn't.

Curling his hands into fists, Jimbo tossed his lucky hat to the passenger's seat before angrily pulling it back on his head. To be honest, Jimbo never thought about the future of their friendship. Never once did he think about getting married or moving out of South Park. Ned was his company, Ned made him happy. He always assumed they would grow old and sit on their front porch to shoot at the birds that passed by. Watch bad television, joke about the youth, polish their guns and just enjoy a self fulfilling life. There was that warm feelings again-

But.

What if Ned left.

What if he moved out and married a lovely lady?

What would he do?

Perhaps it was selfish, Jimbo never once considered Neds feelings on the matter. They had been together for so long, it was rather scary to imagine Ned moving out. But the more he pondered the more confused he became. After all these years, Jimbo never felt the urge to find a wife. Dating seemed to be a hassle and women already flagged him as the town redneck. Their loss, he was handsome. However the case was the same for Ned. His war buddy did flirt occasionally, but had no deeper intentions than to be polite. Sure Ned has been married, and he knew all the horror stories regarding the previous Ms. Braginsky. But neither of them had any girlfriends, no dates, nothing.

It was all so confusing, another reason he chose not to dwell on these strange feelings in the first place.

Bottling up his thoughts and feelings just came back to kick him in the face and have a round at his gut. No matter how hard he tried to shove the thought of Ned from his mind, he just appeared with that heart warming smile almost completely reserved for him while everyone else was used to the stoic, blank expression of the bearded man.

Holding his head in his hands, Jimbo squeezed his eyes shut till colors dance behind his lids. Heart racing in his chest, the man struggled between crying and punching a hole clear through his windshield. Jealous, he was jealous Ned wasn't flirting with _him._

With a startled shout, Jimbo punched his steering wheel and finally let his emotions bubble to the surface. For once, he was happy to be alone.


End file.
